Navigating the Holidays

The holiday season is often marketed as a time of joy, connection, and celebration. This time of year can also bring a unique mix of emotional, financial, and cultural stressors. Whether it’s navigating Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), trying to stretch a budget to show love through gifts, or managing the emotional labor we often carry for family and community—December can be a lot. If you’re feeling the weight of it all, you’re not alone. And more importantly: there is nothing wrong with you. The holidays can be complicated, but with intention, planning, and compassion for yourself, they don’t have to overwhelm your mental health.

Families often carry deep cultural traditions of generosity—buying gifts, cooking, hosting, showing up for everyone. Many of us grew up hearing:

• “Make sure everybody else is good.”

• “Don’t show up empty-handed.”

• “Sacrifice for the family.”

  
  

These messages come from love, resilience, and community-care… but they can also create guilt, especially when finances are tight or emotional energy is low.

This year, many are facing rising living costs, job instability, and long-standing family responsibilities. Feeling torn between wanting to give and needing to take care of your own life is real—and it does not mean you’re selfish.

1. Understanding SAD in Our Communities

Seasonal Affective Disorder is more than “winter blues.” It is a mood disorder linked to decreased daylight, colder months, and disrupted routines. While SAD affects people of all backgrounds, Black and Brown individuals are less likely to be diagnosed and less likely to access treatment—not because we don’t experience symptoms, but because depression in our communities often shows up differently or goes unacknowledged.

Common signs include:

• Feeling low, heavy, or disconnected

• Difficulty waking up or feeling energized

• Loss of interest in activities

• Cravings for carbs or weight changes

• Irritability or emotional sensitivity

If you notice these patterns every fall or winter, it’s important to be proactive.

Be proactive about SAD:

• Prioritize exposure to natural light as early in the day as possible.

• Use a sun lamp/light therapy box if recommended by your provider (inexpensive to get on Amazon).

• Move your body daily, even for 5–10 minutes.

• Keep a consistent sleep schedule.

• Seek support before symptoms peak—don’t wait for the crash.

2. The Financial Stress of Gift-Giving

In many of our cultures, giving is an act of love, respect, and belonging. We show our care through showing up, feeding people, and yes—gift-giving. But when the pressure to give exceeds our financial reality, the holidays can bring shame, anxiety, and guilt.

Let’s be real:

• Inflation is hitting our communities harder.

• Many of us have multigenerational obligations.

• Some of us are the “go-to person” for emotional and financial support.

• There may be unspoken expectations about what we should provide.

A healthier perspective on giving:

• Your presence is often more valuable than your presents.

• Set a realistic budget and hold that boundary.

• Consider low-cost, high-love options:

  • Personalized notes or a heartfelt letter

  • Cooking someone’s favorite dish or baked good

  • A phone call or video message

  • Quality time rituals

  • A playlist you curated

  • Photo memories or framed pictures

• Practice saying:“This year, I’m keeping things simple so I can take care of myself too.”

Guilt is not a love language.

3. How to Pour Into Yourself During the Season

   Self-preservation is not selfish—it’s a continuation of the legacy our ancestors created for us. You cannot pour into others when your own cup is empty.

   A. Name what you’re feeling

   Instead of pushing through, pause and acknowledge:

   • “I’m overwhelmed right now.”

   • “My energy is low.”

   • “I’m anxious about money.”

   Awareness is the first step toward care.

   B. Create a personal holiday plan

   Ask yourself:

   • What do I realistically have the capacity for?

   • What can I release this year?

   • What gatherings or responsibilities drain me?

   • What actually brings me joy?

   Give yourself permission to protect your limits.

Whether this season brings heaviness or hope, remember:

✨ You deserve ease.

✨ You deserve rest.

✨ You deserve to enjoy the holidays on your own terms.

If you or someone you know is looking for support, therapy can be a powerful grounding space—before, during, and after the holiday season.